The Potential of Saying No
Email 1
Copy/Paste the following email:
Subject Line: The Potential of Saying No, Part One
Greeting Parents:
I don’t know about you, but I love giving my kids special gifts and being able to say “yes” to fun things. Part of what I look forward to as a parent is being able to say “yes” to all the things I didn’t get to have or do when I was growing up.
The reality is, now that I am a parent, I have learned one of the most powerful words in the parent vocabulary- “No!”. It is what this month’s online parenting class is about.
While this might be a hard one for us to watch and apply, it is important to understand the when and why of the parental “no”. Please take the time to watch and consider the four places you might need to start saying the word “no” more with your children and around your home.
Consider that just like our heavenly father, who does say “no” or “wait” to our requests, sometimes we also must learn to say “no.” It is all in order for us to say “yes” to better things for our children.
I will be in prayer for you this month as you leverage the power of “no’s” in your home and family life. As always, I am here to back you up as a parent in your decisions and even in your “no’s”. Let me know how I can help and pray for you!
https://vimeo.com/parentministry/review/257625547/c24820b1c4
In Him,
Children’s Pastor
Email 2
Copy/Paste the following email:
Subject Line: The Potential of Saying No, Part 2
“I said, ‘No!’”… how often have you said that in the last week or maybe two? Do you say “no” to your children? Some people may tell you that you shouldn’t ever tell your kids “no”. This month’s Online Parenting Class actually teaches you four potential places and times that the word “no” might be a good thing around your home.
Parents have almost become addicted to always saying “yes”. The constant habit of saying “yes” in the end has left many parents and families in a state of frustration. Even more, as children get use to always being told “yes” to everything, when the time comes in life to hear a “no,” they will not know how to handle it.
Here are four challenging questions to go along with the four places you might need to start saying “no” to more:
1. What is one thing on your personal or family calendar in the next month that will rob your family of time together?
2. What is one activity or habit around your home that honestly holds no real spiritual or emotional value for your family?
3. What is something that has the potential of being unhealthy for your child/children- spiritually, mentally, emotionally or physically- that you might need to consider saying “no” to?
4. Are your children spoiled? Be real with yourself and each other; step back and look at the things your child/children have been asking for or want. Do they really need that thing? Have you ever talked as a family about the difference between a “need” and a “want”?
As always, my heart is to help you improve your home life and empower you as parents to live as Godly parents. Even God says “no” to us, His children, so let me know how I can help you with this idea.
Sincerely,
Children’s Pastor
Video Script
The Potential of Saying No
There is nothing quite as fun as being able to get our kids what they want on their birthday or at Christmas. They make a list, we think about it, then, hopefully, we get to surprise them with the gift. Giving our kids good things is rewarding.
In this online parenting class we are going to talk about giving our kids something they don’t get enough from many of us. This month we are going to talk about the potential of saying no more often at home.
No does not seem like a fun thing to give to our kids. No seems like the opposite of fun and many times its not that fun, but it’s 100% good. We live in a say yes culture. We say yes to opportunity, so we get our children involved in tons of activities. We say yes to fun toys and gadgets so our kids can be entertained. We say yes to church activities, so we plug them into all kinds of programs. We say yes to friends and what I call parent pressure, so we get our kids into all kind of cultural activities so they don’t miss out. We say yes all the time and most families are spiraling out of control trying to keep up.
Our addiction to saying yes has left many of our families and our marriages in a terrible state of frustration. This month we want you to try out a new word than can bring focus and health to your home and than word is no.
No is a difficult word to say in the moment. When we say it we are worried about the consequences. Will we miss out? Will we hurt someone’s feelings? Will our kids understand? These are all just fears of the unknown and probably are unrealistic. Most of the time saying no will only allow you as a parent to help your family focus on important things. Saying no has the potential to allow you to control your family calendar and actually allow your home to function as a healthy pace. That is a powerful tool.
Saying no can be hard so here are four places to start saying no more…
Say no to things that keep your family from sharing family meals together.
Look at your calendar and see what is pulling your family away from eating together and hanging out. I bet you have said yes to too many good things that you are missing the best things at home. Don’t trade that time away. Leverage no and pull back so you can have time at home together.
Say no to things that you really don’t see value in.
There are some invites that need to be turned down because you are only saying yes out of obligation. You have limited amounts of time to plug your kids into meaningful experiences. Don’t waste that important time with things that have little value.
Say no to things that are not healthy for your child.
There are just things that are not good for our kids. Unlimited access to the internet is bad. Unlimited exposure to TV is not healthy. Only eating gummy bears will lead to a terrible dental bill. Allowing your child to spend the night with a family you don’t trust can lead to bad situations. Leverage no when you don’t sense something is good rather than live with regret of a careless yes.
Finally…
Say no some things that your kids are asking for.
Sometimes we say yes to our kids so much we simply spoil them. Don’t give in the pressure to say yes to everything your child wants. They will be fine without the latest gadget or toy. You may get it down the road, but teach them they are not going to get everything they want. Kids need to hear no from us in order to appreciate when we say yes.
Thanks for checking this online class out. Go out and leverage your no today.
Texts/Tweets
TIP: Choose a hashtag for your tweets and use it consistently. That will tell Twitter to store a list of your tweets on one place for later reference.
Tweet One: Our addiction to saying yes has left many families in a terrible state of frustration. #parenting #strongparent #sayno #stoptheyes
Tweet Two: The most powerful word a parent can use is the word “no”. It has the power of health, happiness, and hope for a child’s future. #sayno
Tweet Three: Parents needs to learn to say no to things that take them away from family meals. #mealtime #familymeals #sayno #parenting
Tweet Four: Parents that say no to things that hold no value will, in the end, value their marriage, home and kids more. #parenting #saynotosayyes
Tweet Five: Leverage no when you don’t sense something is good rather than living with the regret of a careless yes. #parent #family #sayno