Author Archives: Jeremy Lee

Conflict

Parenting from a United Front

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Subject Line: Parenting from a United Front, Part One

Hello Parents!

Between us as parents, it can become stressful as we work together to present a united front on parenting issues that come up.

That is actually what this month’s Online Parenting Class is all about, “Parenting from a United Front”.

As you watch this short video, hopefully it helps you shape a plan and prayer for parenting together over these months of extra time together as a family. Whether it be in those downtime moments of boredom, long vacation rides in the car, or the normal sibling arguing, use these helpful hints to come together to parent.

Remember, you are not doing this parenting-thing alone. You have each other. You have me, available as always. Most importantly, you have God. Even in the tensest moments, take a step back and ask Him for help.

As the end of the video says, “Parenting is an adventure”.

Praying for you, your spouse, and your kids!

https://vimeo.com/parentministry/review/257631271/199de01d1f

In Him,
Children’s Pastor

Email 2

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Subject Line: Parenting from a United Front, Part 2

Hello, Hello Moms, Dads and Amazing Adults in the Lives of Kids:

We are back around with another great Online Parenting Class, to inspire and inform you! It is a quick couple minutes of your month to give you the tools you need to continue to do what God has blessed you to be able to do, raise Godly kids!

This month is another great video, that I am sure you will love. It is about “Parenting from a United Front”.

We all have those moments when we feel like Satan is trying to “divide and conquer” us as parents. An issue arises, and we find ourselves feeling at odds with each other as parents. Suddenly, our unity is being challenged by an issue, big or small, and we are not sure what to do!

There are FOUR great things the video suggests as solid advice. I especially love the idea of making it an opportunity to get a babysitter and have some dinner privately to talk intentionally.

I also completely agree with the idea of making sure to support each other publicly while waiting until later to talk privately. It’s such a common-sense suggestion, but one we often struggle with in the moment.

The final suggestion is one that I have never thought about in the way they suggested. Once again, being intentional in parenting by making a yearly plan that matches up with each child’s age/stage of life. This is one that I would love to help you with as part of our ministry to you as parents. We have some great resources about each stage of your children’s lives, that we would love to share with you, if you are interested.

I hope you enjoyed these suggestions. Please keep me informed on how I can continue to support you and pray for you throughout this month!

Grace and Peace,
Children’s Pastor

Video Script

Parenting from a United Front

Have you ever found yourself fighting with your spouse about parenting more than actually parenting? I have, and I bet you have to. There are just times when mom and dad have a different view on how parenting moments should go down.

In this online parenting class we are going to process how we can parent from a united front. How do we work toward common goals as parents and stay on the same page as we invest in our kids?

Learning to parent from a united front is critical right now because your kids are not teens. Your children are young, and their freedom is limited. This is key because right now you get to practice when you have lots of control. Your level of control in 3rd grade is massively bigger than in 8th grade. The issues you are facing are smaller than the issues your child will face in the future. This is the time for you and your spouse to get on the same page about what matters the most and unite around those issues.

The first step to parenting from a united front is to expose the cracks and talk about those differences with each other! The more you ignore the differences you have as parents today only fuels the problems of tomorrow. There will never be unity when there is hidden animosity lurking around the corner. It’s normal to have these differences, but in order to have a united parenting strategy, these differences have to be exposed. Get a babysitter, head to a great restaurant, and start unpacking the issues.

Once we know where tension can arise there are some rules we can all embrace to keep our parenting effort united…

1. Support Publicly / Question in Private

This is really simple. When your spouse makes a parenting choice just be supportive even if you have questions about what happened. Leaning on the child’s perspective will only give you a partial picture. Get the full story in private and don’t undermine you spouse.

2. Never Complain about Your Spouse to Your Kids

This should be a no brainer but sadly we have all fallen into this trap when tired. Don’t complain about your spouse to your kids. Your kids don’t need to hear that and you are probably just tired. Kids internalize that kind of conflict and worry about it.

3. Share Discipline

There should be no good cop / bad cop in your house. Step up and share the discipline in the home. Don’t allow one parent to become the one that always handles problems.

4. Develop Yearly Game Plans Together

You children change year to year and it’s important to adjust the parenting strategy as they grow. Set aside time to process the plan together each year. Again, just another reason to go on a date and plan some!

Parenting is an adventure! Get on the same page and go make a difference in the life of your child.

Texts/Tweets

TIP: Choose a hashtag for your tweets and use it consistently. That will tell Twitter to store a list of your tweets on one place for later reference.

Tweet One: The first step to parenting from a united front is to expose the cracks and talk about those differences with each other! #parenting #unitedparenting #familymin #momlife #dadlife #summertime

Tweet Two: Ignoring the differences you have as parents today only fuels the problems of tomorrow. #unitedsummer #parenting #familylife #parent #mom #dad #parentlife #mommy

Tweet Three: Support your spouse publicly and question them privately when it comes to parenting. #supportmom #supportdad #teamparenting #dadandmom #familylife #parents #parenting

Tweet Four: Never complain about your spouse to your kids. They need to see you united and supporting each other. #supportyourspouse #oneteam #teammom #teamdad #godlyparenting #unitedparenting

Tweet Five: There is no good cop or bad cop in parenting; there is just a good mom and good dad loving their kids. #nogoodcop #nobadcop #parenting #copout #family #loveandlaw #momlife #dadlife

Tweet Six: Your children change year to year, and it’s important to adjust the parenting strategy and rules as they grow. #parentplan #parentstrategy #mom #dad #family #parents #parenting

Backpack Blessings

What is It?

“Backpack Blessings” are a simple, small way to give your child a quick verse of encouragement as they pull out a particular item on their back to school list this year. You can use them all at once on the same day, the first day of school, or you can spread them out for 10 days or even 10 weeks. They are a simple way to take a little of God’s word and an encouraging word from you with them to school.

How do I use it?

This is in pdf format so you can:

email to the parents of your ministry
print and distribute to the parents of your ministry

Download

Resource Cards: Dinner Discussions

What is It?

Resource cards are an easy way to put a parenting resource into parents’ hands! Each card has a link that directs the parent to one resource that will help them connect with their child and disciple them at home. You download the cards, cut them out, hand them to parents, and BOOM…they’re happy!

How do I use it?

This is in pdf format so you can:

print and cut out to hand to parents
print and distribute to your ministry team
email to your ministry team

Download

Family Fun Night: Family Feud

What is It?

This resource is all you’ll need to pull of a fun-filled Family Night at your church with a Family Feud game with parents versus kids! This encourages kids and parents to interact and cultivate that parent-child connection and relationship by having fun together!

How do I use it?

This is in pdf format so you can:

print and use to plan your family event
print and distribute to your ministry team

Download

Relationship

Dads and Daughters

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Subject Line: Dads and Daughters, Part One

Hello Parents, and Happy Father’s Day month.

I just wanted to say, right off the top, thank you dads! Those of you who are receiving this and are a dad to one of our wonderful kids, thank you. Whether you are a grandfather, stepfather, or even an uncle, you are a ‘dad’ in God’s eyes. The spiritual role that you play is so important to the boys and girls of our church.In honor of you, this month’s Online Parenting Class is for you.

Last month’s virtual encouragement was for Mothers, specifically to their relationship with their son. This month, we are flipping the script and talking about dads connecting to the heart of their daughter!

This is such a huge thing in our current culture and the climate of our society. The conversation in the news and media is all around the idea of women being valued and not demeaned. Whether you are watching this video as a dad or a mom, these quick hints are HUGE for the young girls of our group. Please take the time to watch and think through these and other ways to connect to your daughter’s heart.

We want our young girls that are growing into women to know and understand a healthy relationship with the men in their life. It starts through their relationship with their dad or a Godly man in their life.

Moms: We know that not every girl in our group has a dad in her life, so let us know how we can come alongside them (and you as parents). We are always seeking ways to build into them Godly self-image and set them up to be the women God has set them up to be! Let us know how we can encourage your daughter and your family!

https://vimeo.com/parentministry/review/257632682/af60c47729

In Him,
Children’s Pastor

Email 2

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Subject Line: Dads and Daughters, Part 2

Greetings, Moms and Dads!

Mother’s Day was last month, and now this month is Father’s Day! Let’s celebrate the wonderful men in our lives! I hope you are planning on doing something special for the dads in your life, and dads, I hope your family is planning somethings great for you! Fingers crossed for a great new tie!!?

Last month, we shared a great monthly Online Parenting Class with you about Moms connecting to their sons. This month, since it is Father’s Day month, we are sharing some quick helpful words about dads connecting with their daughters!

There is such great, simple, but powerful wisdom in the steps that were shared. Let me add a little bit extra to keep the challenge going. Think through each suggestion using these questions:

Take them out on simple and fun dates and adventures.
o Where would your daughter want to go on a “date” if she could choose?
o Where was your first date? Would you be willing to share that with your daughter?
Have intentional conversations every day. (It’s ok to leverage tech!)
o When was the last time you sat down with your daughter, just the two of you, and had an intentional heart to heart talk?
Let them know you love them and they are beautiful as much as possible!
o When was the last time your intentionally told your daughter you loved her and she was beautiful?
Listen to them when they are hurting.
o What is hurting your daughter’s heart right now?
o When was the last time she cried about something that was not a physical hurt?

Dads (and moms), these years are so important for your young daughter. Please take and make the time to spend with them, getting to know their heart.

Serving Our Heavenly Father-

Children’s Pastor

Video Script

Dads and Daughters

There is a special bond between a daughter and their dad. It’s a connection that happens over time, and it’s so magical. Daughters see in their dad a picture of what a man should be. I know that puts a ton of pressure on us as dads, but, trust me, daughters don’t need perfection. Daughters need dads that will be authentically present in their lives.

This month in our online parenting class we want to talk to dads and process together how dads can connect with the heart of their daughters. If you are a mom and you usually watch these for your family this is a month you want to mention to dad!

If you are a dad and you are watching your little girl move into older elementary school you are probably already overwhelmed with how they are changing. If you are a dad of a middle or high schooler you wonder if they need or want you around at all. To both sets of dads I am here to boldly declare this truth…

Your daughters need you more now than ever.

I know they don’t tell you they need you and most of the time they act like they don’t want you around, but your daughters need your stable presence in their life right now. I know this makes you a little uncomfortable, but getting out of your comfort zone and fighting for the hart of your daughter now will pave the way for them to make better choices down the road because you have bravely let them know you believe in them, love them, and will protect them.

How do you fight for your daughters heart? Here are a few simple steps any dad can make to build that bridge to their heart…

Take them out on simple and fun dates and adventures.

What is their favorite restaurant? Take them there to eat dinner or breakfast before school. Who is their favorite band? Buy tickets to the next show and take her. What does she love to do? Make plans even if it’s taking her to the mall for a quick trip, and you hate shopping. Give your daughter the gift of your time and the gift of adventure.

Have intentional conversations everyday. (It’s ok to leverage tech!)

I know we dads don’t enjoy talking as much as mom, but our daughters need us to engage them. Check in on them. Shoot that daily text. Take time after work to see how their day went. Ask how you can be praying for them. Even if it’s short, make time to talk everyday.

Let them know you love them and they are beautiful as much as possible!

This is critical. They need to hear you say you love them everyday. They need you to build their confidence by letting them know how beautiful they are. They don’t need to hear those things more from a dumb boy at school than they do from you. Your words of care and love matter!

Listen to them when they are hurting.

Don’t allow mom to be the only one talking your daughter through trouble and pain. Make sure your daughter can have time to process with you. I know you don’t have answers but you can listen. That’s all they want anyway!

These are 4 things any dad can do. Your daughter needs you to fight for her heart! Praying for you as you invest in your daughters.

Texts/Tweets

TIP: Choose a hashtag for your tweets and use it consistently. That will tell Twitter to store a list of your tweets on one place for later reference.

Tweet One: Daughters see in their dad a picture of what a man should be. #dad #dadlife #daughter #daddydaughter #fatherhood #picturethis #family #parenting

Tweet Two: Getting out of your comfort zone and fighting for the heart of your daughter now will pave the way for them to make better choices down the road. #dad #daughter #pavetheway #girltowoman #comfortzone #parenting #fatherhood

Tweet Three: You daughter needs her daddy to take her on her first date, to set the expectations high for those “other” guys in her future. #daddate #daddy #dating #fatherhood #dad #daughter #parenting

Tweet Four: Dads and daughter need to have intentional conversations ever day to stay connected to each other. #talk #connect #dad #daughter #parenting #convos #intentionalparenting

Tweet Five: Even if it’s short, make time to talk every day to let your daughter know you love them and they are beautiful in your eyes. #dad #daughter #beauty #talk #saythewords #connected #hearttalk

Tweet Six: Dads-connecting to the heart of your daughter happens through listening to them in the good times and in the bad. #dad #father #daddyhood #fatherhood #listen #daughterheart

Relationship

Moms and Sons

Email 1

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Subject Line: Moms and Sons, Part One

Greetings Parents:

If you are receiving this and you are a mom, this is especially for you. Dads, you
are welcome to listen in too because next month I will be writing to you. This
month’s Online Parenting Class is a special one because it is all about mother-son
relationships. I think all of you moms are really going to enjoy it!

What powerful encouragement and words of wisdom! A son’s relationship and
connection with his mom is a powerful thing. It truly shapes the kind of man he
will grow up to be, but it also will influence the kind of father and husband he will
choose to be as well.

I love the challenge to “stop trying to protect your boys and instead challenge
them toward adventure and self-discovery.” This is a huge truth for us as parents.
We want to protect our children and keep them from making mistakes. We know,
however, in the moments of falling and getting hurt we learn. This is especially
true for boys. Each scrape, bruise, and scar is a life lesson learned.

Moms look for those teachable moments to connect to the heart of your young man
in your home. As he excitedly tells you his story of heroics and adventure,
showing off that cut or scrape, don’t react, but rather interact.

I want to let you know that I am praying for moms in specific and real ways
this month when it comes to relationships with your sons! I am praying for God to
give you words to say, time to spend, and patience to listen!

https://vimeo.com/parentministry/review/257631869/a84f593d80

In Him,
Children’s Pastor

Email 2

Copy/Paste the following email:

Subject Line: Moms and Sons, Part 2

Hello, Moms!

How is your relationship with your son? Is it going well, or are you finding it
harder to connect to their heart as they are going older?

This month’s Online Parenting Class is for you! It is about 5 steps to
connecting/reconnecting to your son’s heart!

Investing intentional time and doing intentional things with your son is a
powerful thing. Find the things they enjoy, and do life with them in those
things!
Find ways to show your support for your son, and speak words of
confidence in the good and the bad moments.
The best way to show your support and be intentional with your time is
simple…just show up. Presence is powerful in your relationship with your son!
Moms, you have a voice in your son’s life. Make sure you use it to encourage and not nag. Your voice and care will capture the heart of your son and communicate you care. This will give your son power, confidence, and life.
The key to all of these things in your ears. You ask your son to listen to you,
but you also must learn to listen back. It is the only way you will hear his heart.

Let me know how I can help you process and live out each of these steps this month. My door, phone, and email is always open to you as a parent.

Children’s Pastor

Video Script

Moms and Sons

Moms and their sons have a unique bond. I’m so excited that this month we are going to block out time just to talk to moms of boys and process how to connect with their hearts for the long haul. The time and energy you invest in your son is a powerful force that shapes the future of their life.

Let me be clear about one thing. I’m not a mom, but I’m a son and my mom worked hard to build a meaningful relationship with all of my bothers. Her influence in our lives is still clear today in our lives.

No pressure mom. Your influence matters no matter what but there is one way to change the direction of your parenting of your son that will exponentially increase your influence. That one shift to make is simple but incredibly difficult for moms. Process this idea mom…

Stop trying to protect your boy, and, instead, challenge them toward adventure and self-discovery.

Most moms spend their whole parenting life trying to protect their boys from their wild selves. Moms make sure their boys have manners, are healthy, and stay safe. The problem is those things really don’t matter to any boy in elementary school or as a teenager. Boys are looking to figure out who they are and what adventure they can go on. They need someone to breath belief into their insecure souls.

You can be that voice. If you want to capture the heart of your son believe in them and empower them to do great things.

Invest intentional Time to Do Things with Them.

What is your son into? Find out and make some time for just you and him to spend time together around that passion. Music lover? Hit a concert. Sports fan? Go to a game. Actor? Then make sure and take them to the theatre. The common denominator is you encouraging them to chase their dreams. They need that encouragement.

Support them and Cheer Them On.

Dad naturally spent tons of time challenging their sons. As Dads, we have to embrace that role. Mom, that opens a door for you to step in and be a needed voice of encouragement for them. Kids need both. They need challenge and they need encouragement. When moms embrace that role they breath confidence in them.

Boys Need you to Keep Showing Up.
As kids grow older it’s easy for Moms to withdraw. Your son does not need you to pull away from them. Your son needs you to keep showing up for them in creative ways that allow them to have their space but also know you care deeply. Keep showing up at their events. Keep writing them notes on hectic weeks. Keep texting them scripture leading them toward Jesus. Don’t allow them growing older to keep you from showing up in their life.

Speak Truth but Never Nag.

Your son needs you to be honest with them. You have things you see in your son that need to be challenged and they need you to speak truth. What they don’t need is nagging. Tell them once and then walk away. Don’t gripe and nag on them until you get results because in the process you lose their heart. Speak truth in love and be clear about what you expect.

Listen to Them and Help them Learn to Process their Emotions.

Here is where you have such an advantage as a mom! Your son needs you to help them learn to express and understand their emotions. When you slow down and give your son a listening ear consistently you slowly teach them to confront their emotions and process them out loud. Your son will have such an advantage in life if they know they have a person in their corner they can trust to listen and they learn from you to get those emotions out.

Mom, all 4 of these steps are things any mom can do. Thanks for investing in your sons intentionally this month.

Texts/Tweets

TIP: Choose a hashtag for your tweets and use it consistently. That will tell Twitter to store a list of your tweets on one place for later reference.

Tweet One: Stop trying to protect your boy, and, instead, challenge them toward adventure and self-discovery. #boymom #parenting #momlife

Tweet Two: Boys are looking to figure out who they are & what adventure they can go on. They need someone to breathe belief into their insecure souls.

Tweet Three: Moms, invest intentional time with your boys now, and you will reap the returns of your interest in the future. #mominvestment #motherhood

Tweet Four: Mom, breathe confidence into your sons so they can breathe in their Godly calling for manhood. #mom #motherhood #momlife #Godscalling #sons

Tweet Five: Moms that show up in their son’s life now will have sons that continue to show back up in their lives later. #momlife #showup #mothers

Tweet Six: Trade nagging for speaking truth in love to your children. #nomorenags #mom #dad #parenting #parentlife #speaktruth #love

Father’s Day: Top 10 List

What is It?

We all know dads need encouragement, and what better day to encourage the fathers of your students than on Father’s Day? We have compiled a Top 10 List of reasons that dads can be the “best dad ever!”

How do I use it?

This is in pdf format so you can: